


Little Crow

by vsulli



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-19
Updated: 2018-02-01
Packaged: 2018-12-31 13:33:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12133593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vsulli/pseuds/vsulli
Summary: A lot of different people show up to the Slat looking for a job or just for solitude. The slat offered a home to grown men in trouble with the law and teenagers who have too many debts to pay. When the dregs open the door one day and see a cradle, offering only a note for explanation will their leader take the baby in or throw her back to let Ketterdam have it’s way with her?aka a baby shows up at the Slat and everyone is Shook





	1. Arrival

_Dear Mr Kaz Brekker, you are the bastard of the barrel, she is the same. She is just 4 months old, born from a forced hand to a 14-year-old girl who had nothing to her name. This child would not survive this world without your help. She is one of you, I hope you will treat her as such._

     The letter was written in perfect Kerch, clearly not the writer’s native language. The Dregs circled around the wooden cradle as if it held a life supply of gold and jewels, they’d never seen something so rare before. However, their gawking stopped as they moved aside when the thump of a cane came from the stairs, Kaz Brekker following right after it.

“It was just on the front steps, Boss, it was cold so we brought it inside. We didn’t know what else to do.” Someone said. Kaz seemed to ignore them as he made his way to the table. His breath caught at the sight of what laid on top, but he made sure no one noticed.

     In all his years in ketterdam he had never seen something so small and delicate, babies just weren’t a part of this work. People seemed to just be born as corrupt adults. She was wrapped up in rags, her dark skin contrasting perfectly against his own. She was Suli, or Zemeni but her nose was the same shape as Inej’s, he fought the urge to smile at it.

“What do we do with it?” Beatle asked.

“We could drop it off at a pleasure house, it’ll be useful in a couple years,” someone else offered. Kaz ignored the suggestion, only giving the speaker a glance before looking back around the room.

     He wasn’t qualified to make decisions like this, he was a criminal who dealt with money not babies. He needed Nina, or Inej, not a group of rowdy con artists and killers. However, he knew these people, he knew quite a few of them had younger sisters and one even a daughter. Those few looked down on the small bundle with faces that made Kaz sure they’d protect her from the things that made all of them who they were today.

“She’ll stay here, for now. The Wraith’s room is now unoccupied. Someone find her some clothes and food,” he said before walking into his office. He listened to the rushed conversation coming from the main room, confusion being the main theme in it all. Grabbing his coat and hat he walked back out, calling that he’d be back in an hour.

* * *

     Marya Hendriks had no place bring in the slat, she was too soft and floaty to be in such a hard place. She earned stares as she followed Kaz up the steps, most confused but others in awe of her. Kaz needed a mother to give input on keeping the child, there may not have been a shortage of them in ketterdam, just a shortage of ones who’d willingly come to Kaz Brekker’s aid. It wasn’t a very inviting invitation.

“Why are we here, Kaz?” Wylan asked from behind his mother. Nowadays he went where ever his mother went and no one could stop him. The boy didn’t have his mother for years and he finally got her back, he had to make sure it stayed that way.

     Wylan got no response as he expected but frowned anyway. Though it was a common routine, Wylan had a bit of hope he’d get something since it was his mother that was involved in the current situation. “Do you know anything?” He whispered to Jesper, the other boy could only shrug in response, of course he wouldn’t know a thing, he’d been with Wylan for weeks without word from Kaz.

     They finally stopped in front of what Jesper knew as Inej’s old room, it almost seemed like forever ago that he last saw the Wraith, especially in her room. She left on her third voyage almost three years ago, the longest she'd ever been gone. He missed her when he stepped inside, it still looked the same as if she’d never left at all. He knew Kaz didn’t let anyone stay in the room, even though Inej tended to stay at the Van Eck mansion when she came back to visit she was still known to creep into the flat on occasion. Kaz just wanted her to have a place to sleep when she did, even if she didn’t spend much time in her own room when she did.

     Kaz turned to look at the three of them, trapping them at the door, his eyes scanned each one as if determining their trust before showing them what was behind him.

“We’ve had an unexpected addition to the Dregs that I don’t know what to make of. I needed Ms Hendriks to help,” he said. Jesper raised an eyebrow and Wylan just nodded, still as confused as ever. Kaz stepped away revealing a lump of a jacket on the bed, but it was what was under the lump that had Marya smiling and rushing towards it.

“A baby, oh look at her, Wylan,” she whispered sitting down next to her. Jesper cleared his throat, the hints of a smirk appearing at the corners of his mouth.

“She looks suli, I didn’t know you and the Wraith were-”

“She’s not mine, you podge.” Jesper hummed and leaned back against the wall. “Someone left her at the door, I didn’t know what to do.” Wylan and Jesper’s eyes widened at that, the great Kaz “Dirty Hands” Brekker admitting he didn’t know what do to.

“It’s much too cold for her here,” Marya’s voice came from the bed where she had taken a seat. Kaz knew this already, which is why he had taken one of his jackets to drape across the baby. “And too dirty.” Kaz hated it but he nodded, she was right.

“Does she have a name?” Jesper asked, but he wasn’t gifted with a soft voice like Marya’s, instead his voice boomed into the room and the baby that had been quiet since she’d arrived now opened her eyes and let out a cry that had everyone scrambling to cover their ears. It was louder than anything Kaz or anyone had ever heard, it had people come rushing upstairs to see what it was. Dregs lined the hall in front of the room trying to peer in. Jesper stood amazed by how wide her mouth opened.

“Shut it off!”

“Make her shut up!”

“Her voice shouldn’t sound like that!” Wylan added which only caused the cries to get louder. 

     Marya was holding the baby up to her chest know, rocking and whispering to her to get her to stop. Kaz was scared she never would, he’d have to invest in some ear plugs for his gang, which was money he didn’t have to spend on such a thing. When her mouth closed the entire building seemed to sigh in relief. Kaz glared at Jesper who moved away from him. Everyone else just seemed to stare at the girl, wondering how a sound like that came from something like her. However, when Kaz turned back to the baby, he didn’t seem as amazed as the others, but more intrigued.

“She kind of sounded like a-”

“Crow.” Kaz finished for Wylan, a smirk rising onto his face.

“We are not calling her Crow, Kaz,” Wylan tried but the smirk never left his face making him sigh. He looked from Kaz to the baby, seeming to be deep in thought.

“What is it?”

“Kaia, the Suli don’t have a word for crow so it’s the word for bird, her name’s Kaia.” Wylan declared, no one opposed him but Kaz rolled shrugged.

“I’m still calling her Crow.” Wylan rolled his eyes and walked over to his mother. “She shouldn’t be in a place like this,” he mumbled.

_What’s wrong with here?_  Kaz wanted to ask but he knew what was wrong, it was cold and loud, too many fights broke out, it just wasn’t an ideal place for a child to be raised. Instead he looked around the room, “any ideas are welcome.”

“There’s Mrs Joya down the-”

“She’ll stay with us, she’ll have a wet nurse and her own maid and all the pretty dresses she wants,” Marya cooed at the girl who had silently woken up again. Kaz couldn’t help but feel weird about the idea of her leaving already but he pushed it aside, he knew it was best for her and he didn’t want to be the reason she didn’t grow up right.

“Okay.”

“That was easy,” Jesper said, “you just got her and Crow is already leaving the nest.” Kaz just looked at him and walked out of the room, leaving the three of them to deal with the baby.


	2. Year One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super short chapter, I know, but at least it's something

Kaz Brekker was a monster, he killed for money and stole to prove a point. 

Kaz Brekker was a monster, he read stories to a baby and rocked her when she cried. No one knew of his Crow, only those residing in the Van Eck mansion and his most trusted dregs knew his relationship with the small girl they called Kaia. The extent of that relationship still a mystery to even them. Everything he did for her was behind closed doors, if someone was present he wouldn’t even go near the poor thing without having a valid reason. No one could know Kaz Brekker had feelings. 

They didn’t celebrate Kaia’s birthday, instead the day they found her at the Slat. Marya baked her a cake, there was too much icing a too little sugar but they had quickly found out that Kaia Rietveld ate anything that was put in front of her. She got presents from the dregs which consisted mostly of stolen blankets and toys. Jesper and Wylan wanted to be funny and had a miniature suit, cane and even gloves made for her to match Kaz, of course he didn’t find it funny but Jesper caught the look of fondness he gave Kaia after Marya put the outfit on her. The one thing Kaia seemed to love the most, however, was Marya’s present, she’d managed to craft a stuffed crow for her and with her son’s help, it sang when its beak was squeezed. Kaia didn’t let go of it and no one dared to try and take it from her, bleeding ears weren’t customary at parties. 

Kaz sat back through the entire event, just watching as his team fussed over their baby Crow, managing just a smirk when he saw Rotty get a piece of cookie smushed into his face and go into a corner to sulk about it. He watched as Kaia’s eyes lit up with every gift she received, she was just over a year old and already she seemed to understand that today was all about her. He wanted to laugh at how she seemed to be basking in it. It wasn’t until everyone left did he finally stand up, Jesper and Wylan watched silently as he pulled a small box out of his pocket and crouch down to Kaia’s level.

“They won’t fit yet,” he told her, she just stared at him with wide eyes and Kaz fought the urge to smile at her, “when you’re old enough hopefully your teacher will be back and she can show you what they’re for.” Out of the box came a pair of rubber slippers, Kaia took them in her hands and just held them, not even knowing what they were. Jesper and Wylan knew though and their eyes narrowed as Kaz stood.

“She is not your next Wraith, Kaz,” Wylan said.

“I didn’t say she was, I wouldn’t force her into that life,” he was quick to retort, never did he ever think about Crow working for him, he didn’t even want her to know of that life until she fully understood what it was. “It’s just if she wants to and if she gets a suitable teacher.”

“Inej would never go for it.”

“We’ll see.” With that he gave Kaia one last look and walked off towards the door. 

Kaia wouldn’t be the next Wraith, Kaia would fly like a crow over the rooftops of Kettterdam and if she wanted to, when she was old enough, she’d make the decision for herself to join the Dregs. It would be her decision and her’s alone, she won’t get to make the decision before she’s ready for it any how.   
_

The Slat was still buzzing when he returned, people just offering a nod and a wave as he passed as he headed up to his room. The thought of Kaia joining him still fresh in his mind. She’d have to join not as his successor but as an equal to all the other members. He would never let her bear the tattoo, not even if she wanted it.

Saints, he was sounding like her father. 

She could wear the tattoo if she made the choice to, not because she felt like she needed to but because she truly wanted it. No one could know who she was either, any relation to him and she’d have a target on her back instantly. Even if no one would mess with Kaz Brekker, they’d still be stupid enough to try.

As he got ready for bed he shook his head of all those thoughts, he couldn’t believe he was really thinking of a one-year-old joining a gang. Have all those years of being on those streets corrupted him that much? Placing his gloves on the side table he finally laid down, sleep not coming to him instantly but arriving nonetheless.

That night he dreamt of crows, flying high in the sky giving him a view of his world. However, what he saw wasn’t what Ketterdam, wasn’t the truth of its people. They all stood silently, staring up at his flock with a look that he knew all too well. The crows scattered as gun after gun was pointed up and shots rang out. He heard their cries, he recognized Jesper, Wylan and Nina, but he couldn’t stop to save them from falling to their deaths. Looking from side to side he was forced to watch everyone he ever trusted leave him. His eyes fell on a crow that was smaller than the rest, flying as if its wings were broken and making noises that weren’t far from the sound a baby would make when it cried for its father. He realized who it was just as it was hit, he couldn’t help but scream as it looked up at him with scared eyes.  
_  
“Kaz? It’s late, did you forget something?” Wylan asked making his way downstairs. Kaz didn’t even acknowledge him as he pushed past, making his way to where Wylan had just come. “Kaz what is it?” 

Kaz still didn’t say a word before he pushed open the door leading to Kaia’s room, he let out a long sigh of relief when he finally saw her looking back up at him, still clutching the crow in her tiny hands.

“What’s wrong?” Kaz quickly straightened and turned back to look at Wylan, who looked both worried and amused by his outburst of affection for the girl. 

“Nothing, why isn’t she asleep?” 

“Maybe the big bad crow barging into her room woke her up,” Jesper’s voice yawned from the door, “Come on, we have some leftover waffles if you’re hungry.”

Looking back at Kaia he just shook his head, “I have work to do,” he stated, he could feel Jesper rolling his eyes behind him and did the same before turning to look at them. “Make sure she’s back to sleep.” Jesper and Wylan moved to let Kaz walk out, but before he did they noticed him grab his present from the table, making sure the slippers were inside before shutting the box again. He gave one final nod to the two before heading downstairs, not even offering a real good bye before leaving. 

Jesper sighed and walked fully into the room before lifting the girl out of her crib. With her on his lap he took a seat on the windowsill to look out at where Kaz was walking.

“He’s just acting like a podge, he loves you and will probably be back with a better present tomorrow.”


	3. Year Two

“Crow’s made him soft.”

“Dirtyhands died the moment we brought that thing in the door.”

“Its been two years, has anyone seen him kill someone? Ruffed someone up for cheating at his club? No.”

The last comment was badly timed, as it was said just as the front door to the Slat swung open and the subject of their conversation walked in. Everyone was silent as they watched him calmly remove his hat, hanging it on a rarely used hook next to the door, he slid off his jacket, hanging that as well before turning around to face the few Crows sitting in the room that afternoon. They stared wide eyed at his gloved hands rolling his sleeved up to his elbows, there was something a bit too normal about the act to be done by Kaz Brekker. He didn’t do normal. 

“Walls are thin in the Barrel, thought you were all smart,” he tsked, “thank you, Squealer, loyalty is always appreciated.” The red-haired boy earned the name for a reason, he smirked at his groups before dashing up the stairs, not eager to stick around for what was to come. The rest scowled after him, he was new to the team, still gaining their leader’s trust. “Don’t worry, he’ll be dealt with, if he snitches on you why should I expect him not to do the same to me.” They all nervously laughed at his statement, not willing to anger him anymore by staying silent. “Now, what is this I hear about me going soft?” 

“It was nothing, we swear,” one said, his voice cracked but Kaz only looked at him, as if bored by the situation entirely. 

The lone girl in the room looked around at her crew and scoffed, Kaz wasn’t surprised, Duchess wasn’t one to stand down from a confrontation. “Scaredy cats, all ya,” she said before standing. Despite her significant height disadvantage from the rest of the world, her stance made her always seem like the biggest person in the room, that is, when Kaz Brekker wasn’t present. He could see the ever-present unease people felt when he was around, he reveled in it. “Your little girl’s made ya soft, Brekker, you just ain’t the same as you were.” He admired her ability to tell things straight, however, he didn’t appreciate that she spoke to him like that. 

“Get out, Viktorya,” he commanded. She was taken aback by her name, no one knew her real name, she’d never said it out loud since she moved to the city. Not even once. “Are you going to stare at me or get out before you make me angrier than I already am?” She gave one last look behind her and stormed out through where he’d just come. Kaz didn’t even flinch when the door slammed, he just watched the uneasy shifting of the men sitting in front of him. “She’s lucky she’s new, she doesn’t know enough for me to care where she runs off to,” he said, the three men jumped when the cane was lifted and pointed to them, “you all, however,” he shrugged, “different story.” 

-

Up in his room he stared at himself in the mirror as he cleaned off. What they were saying was true, Dirtyhands seemed to be no more, and people were starting to notice. It wasn’t that he was actively trying to do better for Crow, it just sort of happened when she came along. He started giving second chances when he wouldn’t have before, he’d hit to prove a point and not to kill, he was changing and there was something he didn’t like about it. He needed to find someone who hadn’t paid their debt to make himself feel better. 

Heading back down to his office to do paperwork, he found himself the subject of everyone’s attention. Everyone too scared to move an inch or say the wrong thing as he passed, making the trek down from his room eerie with the silence and all eyes on him. He expected it, he’d just crippled three of them to prove a point, it seemed to have worked. It wasn’t until he noticed a familiar mop of red hair poking out of a room did he stop.

“Squealer, follow me,” was all he said before continuing. 

The young boy hurried after him, all confidence from before vanishing when he got knowing looks from everyone. This was routine, after all. When they reached his office, Squealer hovered at the door. “Come in and shut the door.” He quickly did as he was told but stayed as far from where Kaz took a seat as he possibly could. Kaz didn’t say a word, for almost ten minutes the boy was forced to stand quietly as he watched his leader shuffle around some papers and write some things down. Just as he opened his mouth the ask why he was there, Kaz looked up at him. “You’re not the first Squealer we’ve had,” he started. The boy gulped, already knowing the story of his predecessor. “A girl, younger than you, she told me about a few members who were planning a coup. Of course, I stopped it and got rid of the planners, dropped them one by one head first into shallow canals,” this part of the story didn’t worry him, it was what was coming next that had him growing more and more ready to run away. “She was good to me for a while, but then I learned she was feeding secrets to my enemies.”

“Mr. Brekker, I swear I won’t do that-”

“I know you won’t, Ilya, because your tongue will be fed to the same rats that took hers and you’ll join her scrubbing the floors of the Crows Club on your hands and knees until you’re too old and frail to be of any use to me,” he threatened, “you’re my personal mole and I hope you take this job seriously. You did good today and if it stays like that, you can expect to have this job for much longer than the last one.” He was finished talking but Ilya stood at the door, unsure if he was allowed to leave or not. “Get out, and clean yourself up I don’t need my crew smelling like urine.” He dashed out the second the words left his mouth, but before Kaz went back to his work, the door squeaked open, Ilya’s head popping back in.

“Flattery won’t get me anywhere, I know, but everyone who says your going soft is wrong. You’re still as scary as the day I heard about you, Mr Brekker,” he said.  
Kaz wanted to smile at the crack of his voice, when the door closed again he allowed himself to. The boy was young, only thirteen years old, he’d be scared of a mouse if it gave him the right look. Looking back down at his papers he sighed, if only everyone was like thirteen-year-old boys, but unfortunately that wasn’t the case and Dirtyhands had to make a few more appearances to make sure his reputation didn’t completely deteriorate. 

-

Watching Crow sleep was a new favourite pass time of his. Ketterdam was a city that was always bustling with activity, Crow was the one thing that pulled him away from all that. Clutching her stuffed crow, which she had recently named Breck, she was completely at peace in a city that didn’t even know the word.  
He came over expecting her to still be awake, was actually surprised by finding her like this. She’d come to figure out his schedule for visiting, would even stay up for hours when he was late just to watch him creep into her room thinking she would be asleep. The first time it happened she’d managed to surprise him, the only person to ever accomplish such a thing. He was quiet, so quiet, but then he heard a scream and a giggle coming from the bed he jumped, not expecting it in the slightest. Today was more of a surprise than then, however, her being fast asleep was a rarity that Wylan and Jesper celebrated every time it happened. 

“I’ve changed because of you,” Kaz whispered, moving a piece of hair out of the girl’s face, “I might lose everything I built just because you took over my life.” Her eyes opened sleepily and he froze, scared that he’d woken her up.

“Da,” she said, her eyes closing again. 

Kaz was frozen. Da. Did she think he was her father? If she would call anyone da is should be Wylan, he was the one who did the most for the girl. Kaz knew she grew an attachment to him but not on that scale. He was probably just being stupid, it was probably just baby gibberish that didn’t mean anything. Pulling on his coat and grabbing his cane, he couldn’t help but give the girl another confused look before walking out. 

-

Sitting down at his old desk, he stared at the tiny piece of canvas he now kept with him. Crow stared back at him, smiling, Marya had done well with the painting. Wylan always joked that Crow didn’t have to hide from the world, she was too happy to have any relation to Kaz. Kaz wondered if he’d be better off if she was left on the Van Eck Mansion’s doorstep instead of his own. He’d have cared much less about the baby that way. He wouldn’t care about the man he was if she wasn’t left in his care. Even better, she wouldn’t have a care for him either.

Da. Her small voice kept replying in his mind and he couldn’t shake it no matter how hard he tried. He was not her father. He’d done nothing to provoke such an opinion in the last two years. 

He often read the letter that he kept from her cradle, wondering why he’d been chosen by whoever it was to watch over the child. “She is one of you, I hope you will treat her as such.” He read that line over and over again. It was true but being one of him meant a life that no one should be forced to live. Leaving her with him had already forced him into thoughts about having the girl work in his gang when she was old enough, he hadn’t had a thought like that in ages but just the memory of giving her those slippers made him hate himself even more. This year her present was just a book filled with blank drawing for her to colour in. It was done by one of his more talented Dregs, a series of old gang symbols and places Kaz had done jobs, she wouldn’t understand it but he would find it amusing that she’d be scribbling all over places and people he did the same too, in his own way of course. 

Maybe he was okay with Crow thinking of him as her father, he wouldn’t deny her being his to anyone who asked. Well, those he’d be willing not to lie to of course. If Jesper referred to her as his daughter, he’d take pride in saying yes, Crow was his. He’d secretly given her his family’s name anyway. Maybe changing isn’t such a bad thing either, she could grow up knowing that Kaz Brekker wasn’t a monster without it being a total lie. He still had old reputations to draw on for intimidation, he was still Dirtyhands, just one that no longer needed to get his hands dirty is all.

A knock on the door pulled his attention away from the painting, no one ever bothered him when he was in his own room, it was an unspoken rule. However, he was thankful for the letter he was handed when he answered it.

“I’ll be on a ship to Ketterdam in one week, make sure there’s waffles” was all it said. 

Kaz smirked at the paper, though it wasn’t signed, he knew exactly who wrote it by the neatly looped letters and just the mention of a crew favourite. 

-

Nina Zenik had not changed in the last five years Kaz hadn’t seen her. She still wore her figure hugging dress, her brunette hair still fell down past her shoulders, and she still had crumbs in her cleavage. She hugged Jesper once she stepped off the ship and Kaz surprised even himself when he allowed her to wrap her arms around him as well.

“Getting soft, Brekker?” She asked, Kaz smiled and shrugged.

“Might be.”


	4. Year Three

If Kaz Brekker was king of the barrel, then Kaia Rietveld was the princess with the Van Eck mansion as her castle. The three-year-old had taken over and no one wanted to stop her. When Nina first met her, she knew instantly what the girl would be capable of, if she could have Dirty Hands wrapped around her finger, she’ll soon have the world in her hands as well. 

“You spoil her,” Nina said one day. 

“I’m just the benefactor, Wylan and Jes are the ones who use the money.” 

It was true, not only was Kaia the center of Kaz’s world, she’d become to center of everyone’s. Wylan Van Eck and Jesper Fahey had become the fathers they never thought they’d ever have the chance to be. If Kaz bought her a toy, Wylan would buy her three to cover up the fact that Kaz still had no clue what kids play with. With Kaz’s allowance and Wylan’s family fortune, Kaia was up to her tiny ears with toys and pretty dresses. Only three years old and the girl could play the system, her big brown eyes made it impossible to say no to her. 

“It’s okay, once Inej is back she won’t let her grow up to be a brat.” Kaz hummed and went back to watching Crow and Jesper play with her boat in the pond, an exact replica of The Wraith, Kaz wasn’t surprised Nina found her spoiled. “What has she said about Kaia?” He didn’t look back at Nina, confirming what she was thinking. 

“Crow hasn’t come up in our letters,” he said quietly. 

“Saints, Brekker, three years and she doesn’t know? What will she think when she learns another Suli girl has taken your heart?” 

Kaz smirked, his eyes trained on Crow and the small ship in her hands. The Suli may believe that a person only has one arrow to find the heart of their true love, but Kaz believed he could have two. Inej would understand, she could never hate Kaz for loving more than anyone could ever believe possible.

“It won’t be a problem, love, I promise.” 

He finally stood just as Crow ran over, her boat clutched tight in her hand with her other reaching up to take his own. She smiled up at him, not even caring that her sleeve was all wet from the water dripping off her toy. Crouching down he tapped on the boat, a small smile on his face, “why don’t we play with that in the bath?” Instantly she stepped back and shook her hand. Like her namesake, Kaia did not like getting wet. 

Jesper walked over and lifted the girl up over his shoulders, taking the boat from her hands and into his own. Kaz stiffened and Nina seemed to freeze, but no cries of protest came as expected. Crow only turned her interest to Jesper’s hair, playing with the curly tuft as if it was a brand-new toy.

“You have to stop asking her, she usually just goes in once you get her into the bathroom,” he explained, tossing the boat to Kaz, “right, Kaia?”

“Right!” 

Laughing, Nina stole Kaia from Jesper, holding her to her hip as she walked back to the mansion.

“C’mon, then, I’ll even use flowery bubbles and then I’ll teach your da how to braid your hair all nice and pretty,” she said to her as she walked. Looking at each other, Kaz and Jesper rushed after her, calling out that they could, in fact, braid hair just as prettily as she could. 

-

Kaz found himself shifting through the last three years worth of letters from Inej, wondering if he really has gone too long without telling her about Crow. There was no way she’d be mad at him for taking in a baby, she might even be proud. It would show her that Kaz Brekker could take care of someone other than himself for nothing in return. So why hadn’t he told her yet? 

_Dear Kaz, I docked at a city today that I did not know existed. It reminded me of the barrel, if it were ten times larger and a hundred times cleaner. I met a man selling blankets with crow stitchings on them for a price way higher than they were worth, but I bought one anyway. Bought, not stole, your teachings are slowly fading away, I’m sorry._

He smiled at that letter, but that was only a month after she’d left, which was years before Crow had even showed up. He moved down the pile a bit, trying to pinpoint the first letter he could’ve mentioned the new addition to the gang. 

_Inej, it’s been exactly three years since you’ve left Ketterdam and you’re finally asking what has changed in your absence. Jesper has grown a beard that your saints would not approve of, we have a wager for when Wylan will finally shave it off, my bet is only a few weeks, I’ve invested in a hotel we’ve renamed the Crow’s Nest, and-_

He could tell where his writing had paused, a small dot darker than the other writing appearing on the page indicating where he stopped to think about what to write next. This was the first letter he wrote after Crow’s arrival, but it was so soon after the fact that no one knew if they were even keeping the baby. He’d written about a new gang forming instead and asked about her next adventure before cutting the letter short. He went through letter after letter like that, always wanting to tell her but hesitating to do so. She’d been gone a little over six years now and all she knew of home were the few things Kaz told her. Wylan and Jesper wrote to her as well, but their letters were more of a ‘hope you’re still alive, we’d kill you if you weren’t’ type of thing and did nothing as far as information went. They’d never tell her about Crow before he did, not without asking anyway. 

When Nina had arrived, she was in complete shock when she saw a baby in the mansion. She yelled at Kaz and the boys about how unprepared they were to raise a child, the only thing that quieted her was the fact that Marya was present and almost aware of how to care for a baby. When she finally met Crow, she couldn’t find herself any of that anger anymore, she’d fallen in love just as the rest of them did when Crow opened her eyes from her nap and smiled up at the new face. Kaz hoped Inej would be the same, he could think of no reason she wouldn’t. He finally opened the last letter from Inej, determined to reply with the news of Crow. 

_Dear Kaz, the first thing I wanted to tell you before you saw me next was that my hair is now cut short to shoulders. I know how much you loved it, but the salt was getting a bit annoying to deal with..._

He wanted to be mad at that, he’d had the pleasure of seeing her hair free of it’s coiled braid, falling in waves down her back. It was one of the few parts of her he could touch without his gloves and not feel anything but love for it. However, he started to wonder how she’d looked now, and the image was something he couldn’t help but let himself smile at.

_...There’s now a little boy on my ship, he’s Zemeni, barely nine years old and he refused to go back home to nothing, so I let him stay. Two of the women on my ship have adopted him as their own, a Shu, a Ravkan, and a Zemeni, it is a strange family, but I’ve never seen more love between three people in my life._

He read on but the story of the Zemeni boy stuck with him, if she could appreciate her crewmates taking in a child, she’ll appreciate him doing the same. Though, as his pen hit the paper, he couldn’t bring himself to write about the child who’d come into his life and taken his name. Inej Ghafa would still know nothing of Kaia Rietveld, not until she stepped on Ketterdam soil once again. 

He sealed his letter and sent it off with one of his runners to be shipped to the location Inej had written in her letter. He hated that he couldn’t tell her about such an important part of his new life, he wasn’t even sure what was holding him back. It could be another month, or even a year before Inej came back, and the later he waited, the chances of the outcome were greatly changed. 

-

Kaz placed a sleeping Crow in to her bed that night, putting Breck and her ship next to her he waited for her to settle in before taking a seat on the chair. She was perfect in every way, nothing about her could make Kaz think in a million years that someone wouldn’t like her. Inej especially. Inej was slow to trust but quick to love and he knew that she’d love Crow more than anything else if she just came home to meet her. It was then that he realized why he couldn’t write it. 

“If I didn’t know you two, I’d think she was your real daughter,” Nina said walking into the room, “you’ve literally turned her into a miniature Kaz Brekker, and if Inej can deal with you, she’ll have no problem with Kaia.” He was quick to turn and look at her, eye brows raised and eyes wide. “I know that’s what you’ve been thinking since I brought it up, stop worrying, you’ll eventually be able to tell her, and when you do, Inej will be able to love Kaia just as much as you do.”

He just wanted to be there when she did, he wanted to explain and help her through understanding why he took in Crow rather than her doing it all herself over a letter. Nina left the room, taking his silence as as much acknowledgment as she was going to get, leaving him alone to watch over Crow as she slept. 

“You have three fathers and Nina Zenik, I hope you’ll get the chance to learn from Inej as much as you have from us. She’s one of the smartest, most beautiful people you will ever meet, and I love her, and I hope you will too,” he whispered as he stood, “and she’ll love you, I promise.” Giving her one last look, he shut the door.


	5. Year Four Part 1

When Kaz woke up that morning, he wasn’t expecting to see the smiling face of a four-year-old girl looking down at him. He jumped a bit, his surprise making the girl giggle and flop down onto the bed next to him. In the four years she’d been around, Crow hardly ever stepped foot in the slat, let alone in the top-most bedroom where Kaz stayed. It wasn’t that he didn’t allow her to be there, it was just she never had reason to be. Everything she needed was at the Van Eck Mansion and Kaz could be there in a moment if he was ever needed or if he ever wanted to see her. So, her being in the slat, alone, was not something he’d ever expect. Sitting up, he turned to look at her, raising his eyebrows at the way she casually laid back on his bed, as if it were her own and no one else’s.

“Crow, why are you here?” She’d stopped giggling, her face serious as she pretended to fly Breck above her head. “Crow, where are Jesper and Wylan?” She still didn’t answer, but the corners of her mouth were turned up into a smile. He watched her continue to play, giving him no mind as he sighed and stood from the bed, throwing the blanket over her as he did.

“Hey!”

He smiled at the way she threw it off her, giving him the same glare that he was told resembled his own. Sitting up, she crossed her arms, Breck sitting on her lap with, what Kaz could only feel, was giving him the same look she was. Ignoring the two, he walked into his old office and started getting dressed for the day. He was sure Crow’s visit wasn’t planned, that would have been something he remembered, he was far too busy to spend the day with her that day, things he didn’t plan around a visit from her. He walked back out of the room as he pulled on his gloves, flexing his fingers as each one was pulled over his hands.

“Why do you where those?”

He looked up at her as he buttoned the glove around his wrist, wondering where the question came from when she’d seen him wearing the gloves for years. She was sitting with her legs hanging off the side of the bed, swinging them back and forth as she watched him re-enter the room. Kneeling the best he could to face her, he crossed his arms over her lap and smiled at her.

“It’s a secret,” he whispered, “but because you’re special I’m going to tell you, okay?” She nodded happily, leaning in a bit as if to hear better. He waited a second, smirking when she started fidgeting and getting impatient.

“Da! Tell me!”

She placed her hands on his shoulders, leaning in so close that her nose was touching his, narrowing her eyes as she stared into his own. He took the opportunity to admire the colour of hers, they were smiliar to another pair of eyes he grew to love, but these ones were all Crow, filled with all the joy and mischief a child raised by the dregs could have.  

“Okay, okay,” she grinned, “you can’t tell anyone though, okay?” She nodded and turned her head, knowing that secrets were always whispered in ears. “They make me look scarier.”

She burst out laughing and fell back onto the bed making Kaz stare at her in confusion, he didn’t understand what was so funny about what he’d just said, the look of the gloves was actually part of the reason he still wore them.

“Why’s that so funny? Am I not scary?” She sat up and shook her head.

“No! You’re my da, you can’t be scary,” she said matter-of-factly. He rolled his eyes, not wanting to argue with a four year old about his image. Ignoring her, he grabbed his cane from the side of the bed and held out his free hand for her to take. “Da?”

“Yes?”

“Scary people don’t hold hands either.”

-

There had been a note on his office door when they’d gotten downstairs, it was from Wylan, Jesper and Nina, explaining that he needed to watch Crow for the day because they had given the staff the day off and they needed a day to themselves. He couldn’t be mad at it, Jesper and Wylan needed time alone with each other without needing to worry about the child that took up residence in their home, and Nina had become to sole female influence on Crow in the last year, making sure she wasn’t too corrupted by having three men taking care of her. It was hard work and Kaz couldn’t help but appreciate the need for a break. Kaz just shrugged and threw the note away before telling Crow to get her jacket and boots on. In any other situation, he would have left Crow at the slat, where he was going was not a place for children. However, it was the time of day when the Slat was mostly empty, everyone gone to do their assigned jobs leaving no one capable of babysitting their boss’s ward in the place.

They now walked through the streets of Ketterdam, Crow unsure of why everyone was looking at them the way they were. Kaz tried distracting her by pointing to different buildings and landmarks that she never would have seen before and telling her stories of the tiny jobs he used to do back before he was the leader. As Crow marveled, Kaz and his men glared at the passersby, letting them know that it was far from okay to stare at them as they walked. 

It hadn’t taken long for Ketterdam to learn that Kaz had a new girl in his life, the image of the gang leader with a child amusing everyone until they learned that bringing her up was a mistake that they shouldn’t make twice. It took until that year for Kaz to finally accept that people knew about Crow, finally allowing the girl to stray from the mansion and experience life as it was in the city. Though, it was still rare to see the big, bad Kaz “Dirty Hands” Brekker holding hands with a four year old girl who smiled and skipped along next to him. It was a bit jarring, to say the least.

Kaz looked down when he felt a tug at his arm, but Crow wasn’t looking back at him, instead her eyes trained on a small shop that they were about to pass by.

 “Can we have ice cream?” She asked making Kaz sigh.

“I have one meeting and then we can have ice cream.” She only nodded, she may have been spoiled but she knew when not to push a matter.

When they arrived at their first destination, Kaz looked back and nodded to Pim and Feliks, who  were following close behind, silently telling them to go on ahead to check out the building before they entered. Crow stared up at the fancy building they stopped at, her eyes wide and her mouth making an O in awe of the thing. Kaz chuckled and tugged on her arm gently to get her to walk inside.

“Weapons in the bin.”

The voice had Kaz looking up, ignoring the confused look the two men gave Crow as he let go of her hand. Looking to the side, he saw his own men getting patted down for anything they might have missed.

“Do you really think I’d carry a weapon with a child present?”

The two men just stared at him, one of them even pushing the bin closer as if to say “yes, we’re not taking any chances with you”. They were smart, Kaz hummed and went into his coat to pull his gun out of it’s holster. He tried not to think about Crow as he disarmed, the girl wasn’t completely unaware of the life that Kaz lived, but seeing a gun verses hearing stories about guns were two different things.

“What about the girl?” One of the men asked, still confused about why she was there.

“What about her?” The other asked.

“She’s a little girl, she has package of sweets in one pocket, she won’t hesitate to bite your hand if you touch it, and her toy can sing, she’s carrying nothing that will cause harm to anyone,” Kaz assured them, wondering how someone could be dumb enough to think he’d let a baby carry a weapon.

They both nodded, not wanting to anger Kaz anymore with their assumptions. After patting Kaz down, and Kaz stopping them with a glare when they looked over at Crow, they finally started walking deeper into the building to where the meeting was to by held. He stopped at the door, letting the other men walk in ahead of his own. He turned to look at them, assessing them to see who would be better fit for the job he was about to give.

“You stay out here with Crow,” he said to Feliks, the man’s eyes widened as he looked between his boss and Crow. The dregs were willing to kill and maim for their gang, but taking care of their youngest member was something that not just anyone would be willing to take on, if anything happened to the little girl, then well, that was a sure way to end up at the bottom of a canal. Kaz sighed and put a hand into his pocket, the men stiffened, wondering what the hell he could be pulling out if he’d just disarmed not even a minute ago. However, they let out a sigh of relief when it was just a deck of cards. “Here, teach her a card trick, she likes them,” he instructed, “just keep her occupied and away from the door, okay?”

“Can I go with you?” It was the question Kaz was waiting for and he shut his eyes when Crow finally asked. When he didn’t answer, she tugged on his coat sleeve, trying to gain his attention, “Da, please?” It took everything in him not to look down and get sucked in by the look he knew she was giving him, it was the look that earned her all the toys she now owned and a bigger bedroom at the mansion. If Kaz looked down now, he was sure he’d let her do as she asked.

“No, Crow, go with Feliks, I won’t be gone long,” he said, lifting their joined hands to pass hers to Feliks. She begrudgingly let Feliks take it, her hand much smaller than the man’s, practically wrapping around a single finger in an effort to hold it. When they started to walk off he couldn’t help but frown at the way Crow was dragging her feet. There wasn’t much that could get her upset, and the fact that it was Kaz who could bring her usually happy mood down was something he was less than okay with. However, there wasn’t much he could do about it, he was due in a meeting.

-

He looked down at the bloodied and bruised bodies of the men around him, the meeting hadn’t gone as planned and he was forced to take measures in a different direction. It wasn’t something he did often anymore, the need for beating not as apparent as it once was when he was still an up and coming leader. He was once accused of becoming soft, and Kaz needed moments like this to prove that that wasn’t the case. Sighing, he grabbed his cane from where it laid on top of the large table, giving one of the men a small nudge with the end of it as he passed.

“Remember this next time you want to cross me, Mr. Parks,” he said before he exited the room. Turning to look at the man, he noticed the way he was smiling, causing an unease to settle over Kaz. The man mumbled something and spit blood out onto the ground, he was the only one of the three still sitting in his chair, giving him an unobstructed view of the two Dregs that stood at his door.

“What was that?” Kaz asked, knowing that it wasn’t something that he’d enjoy hearing.

“I said, you can beat us all you want, but you’ll need to kill us to keep your weakness safe, Mr. Brekker.” He started laughing, taking no mind to the way blood trickled out of his mouth. It took a second for Kaz to understand what he meant, and when he did, he rushed out the door, yelling at Pim to deal with Parks as he did.

He knew he shouldn’t have brought Crow out with him, Kaz may have been a boss but he still had enemies in Ketterdam willing to do anything to bring him down. There were no limits with these people, a four year old girl being anything but off limits to them. Despite his bad leg, he ran to look for Feliks and Crow, and as he did, he remembered a dream he had a few years ago about this very thing happening. The baby crow that was shot out of the sky under his watch might have been coming true, and Kaz lost all of his usual composure at the thought of it. He couldn’t help but remember when Inej was taken, how back then he was able to stay calm, keeping all of his worry bottled up inside him to show that nothing could bring him to a breaking point. All of that was lost when it came to Crow.

When he finally reached the front of the building, he skidded to a halt. Kaz had never found the sound of laughter so comforting before, Crow’s laughter was something that he always wanted to hear every second of the day to know his girl was perfectly safe. He slowly walked over to her, and he found himself smiling when she caught sight of him and grinned.

“Look!” She exclaimed, holding out a fan of cards, “pick one!” He kneeled down on his good leg, smiling as he did as instructed. “Now put it on top!” He watched as she shuffled her small deck, something he taught her awhile ago and that she’d gotten good at just hours after learning. She lifted a single card and held it right up to his face, making Kaz go cross eyed when he tried to focus on what was written on it. “Is this your card?”

“Yes, it is, you did a good job,” he praised.

There was something in him that he hadn’t felt in years, and it caused him to wrap his arms around Crow and pull her to his chest. One of his hand pressed to the back of her head as he held her close. He laughed, genuinely laughed, when he felt her wrap her own arms around him, the assurance that the hug gave him making him want to hold onto her forever.

“Da, I didn’t finish my trick!” Crow said, quickly pulling away from him. She held something in her right hand, her small fist clutched around it making Kaz raise his eyebrows at her. He spared a look over at Feliks, only getting more confused at the look of pride he was giving Crow. “Tricks are just a distraction.” Those were words she’d heard him say the first time he taught her a trick, it was a simple ‘now you see it, now you don’t’ trick that even he learned before he’d come to the city. He’d stolen the wrapped piece of candy out of her pocket that day, it amazed her more than anything else. It should have been worrying, that she was entertained by theft, but he couldn’t help but feel proud when she asked to learn more. Once she repeated the words she held out her hand, opening her fist to reveal the double-sided coin he had hidden in his sleeve.

“How did you know that was there?” He asked, amazed by what she’d just done. She leaned in, just as he had that morning, ready to whisper him a secret.

“Magic.” She squealed when he stood and lifted her, laughing when she wrapped her arms around his neck. Learning her new skill had thankfully helped her forget about Kaz practically abandoning her earlier, her sadness completely being replaced by the joy of besting him at his own game. “Can I have ice cream now?”

“Yes, I think you deserve some ice cream.”

He set her down, but she froze when he held out his hand for her to take, her eyes widening at the sight of something. He quickly drew back, completely forgetting about what now stained his gloves. She hadn’t noticed it before, thankfully, too excited about her trick to pay much attention to the blood that covered the back of his gloves. Pim and Feliks watched him, wondering what had just happened. Clearing his throat, Kaz looked at the two.

“What is-“

“It’s nothing, Crow, just a bit of ink.”

Thankfully the red almost disappeared on the black of his gloves, looking like a colourless inky substance that he could play of as just that. Crow seemed to believe it and nodded, though she made no move to retake his hand before she started walking towards the door. He motioned for Feliks to walk with her, not wanting to scare her anymore than he already has. As the two of them left the building, he and Pim found the bin with their weapons and rearmed themselves, Kaz wiping his gloves on a discarded piece of paper as he did so.

“You shouldn’t bring her to these things, boss, we promised we would keep her away from what we do,” Pim’s quiet voice said. Kaz frowned at his words, he’d been there the day Crow had arrived and he was one of the first to hold her when they’d decided to keep her. Pim was no stranger to what happened to the vulnerable young in Ketterdam, his own family being victim to it not long ago. Kaz only nodded at him, already knowing that what he said was true but not wanting to say it himself.

“She’s going to learn eventually, Pim, better to do it slowly.”

-

Kaz watched her from his place against the wall, the slow rise and fall of her chest, the way she clutched her crow, and the look of peace on her face that could only come from someone who felt completely safe where they laid. Crow was safe with him, he’d always try to convince himself. Nina praised his ability to adapt to having an unexpected child, she always did, but adaption meant changing and Kaz wasn’t sure he was doing enough to change for Crow. His life still posed a threat to her and at this point, he couldn’t bare it if something happened to her. Today was just the first day anyone had dared to use her as a pawn against him, threaten her in the hope of getting Kaz to bend to their will, and there was no saying if it would ever happen again.

Walking over to his bed, he gently sat down next to Crow, careful not to wake her up after the busy day they’d had. It used to be that Kaz was just afraid of change, that the world wouldn’t take him seriously if he’d become soft and easy on those who ran under him. He solved that problem, proving that he was still the same Dirtyhands that ruled the streets years ago, that having Crow meant nothing when it came to business. Then there was the problem of him not being good enough for Crow, that she deserved better guardians who didn’t have his passed trauma. However, he was assured time and time again that he was the best that Crow could have, that no one could keep her from the life of the Barrel better than the top Barrel Boss himself. He was sure Crow was safe with him, he took precautions, made sure that she was aware but not apart of his world. That changed and looking at her now, something so untouched and unchanged by the evils Kaz saw everyday, he couldn’t help but think he failed her some how.

“Well, I wasn’t expecting this.”

He moved faster than a bullet at the voice, so unexpected at the late hour and in his own bedroom. His first instinct was to grab Crow, keep her close to him in case the unexpected intruder was there to take her. His scare from earlier still too fresh in his mind to keep her more than a step away from him. Holding her to his chest now, still fast asleep on his shoulder, he couldn’t help but stumble at the speed in which he moved. The fall against the wall caused her to wake up, waking the four-year-old as she cried out at the unwanted jolt. Crow was almost dropped when Kaz finally looked up at who came in, the image something out of a dream that he could recall all too vividly at that moment. He didn’t drop her then though, he held her closer if possible, his fear slowly being replaced by a tiniest of smiles.  


	6. Year Four Part 2

Kaz stared at her for what felt like hours, not believing that she was there, in his room. She had changed since he’d last saw her, which came to no surprise, she’d just turned nineteen before she set off last, a lot had changed since then. She was no longer a teenaged girl for one thing. He took in her appearance now, she hadn’t lost her acrobat physique, if anything she looked stronger than she had. A year ago, she told him about her hair, it was still cropped just above her shoulders, the thick waves just brushing over the tops of them. With the changes that her travels had brought on, Kaz couldn’t help but admire how beautiful she still looked despite them, making her more so if anything.  She smiled at him now, the smile he never realized how much he missed until that moment.

“Inej,” he whispered, afraid that if he spoke any louder he’d wake up and realize this was just one of his many dreams, “you’re here.”

“I am, and I see things have changed since I’ve been away.”

He’d forgotten about the girl in his arms, she’d become quiet from her sudden awakening, not knowing what was going on when she’d opened her eyes. Turning his head to look at her now, he noticed all of Crow’s attention was on Inej just as his had been. Though, hers might have been for a different reason.

“You look like me,” Crow said slowly, “Da, she looks like me.” Ketterdam had no shortage of Suli people, they had their own communities in the city that had been popping up over the years, but with Crow hardly ever needing to go out passed the mansion grounds, she hadn’t been exposed to many of them. The closest she had was Jesper, but even she could tell they weren’t the same.

“Da?”

Kaz’s eyes widened at the hurt that he could hear in Inej’s voice, for the thought of him giving someone else something that he couldn’t even give her. Looking up at her, he quickly shook his head, gently placing Crow down to stand next to him. Eyes not leaving Inej, he kneeled to Crow’s height, frowning before he finally turned away.

“Anika is downstairs, tell her you haven’t had dinner yet and that I said you can have waffles.”

“What about you?”

“I’m not hungry,” Crow frowned and crossed her arms, Kaz was painfully aware of Inej watching their interaction, assessing everything about it, trying to figure out what was going on before he could shock her with whatever he was going to say. Knowing Crow wouldn’t give up until he agreed to eat, he sighed, “bring me whatever you can’t finish eating, okay?” Smiling when Crow finally nodded, he stood, “your coat and boots are in the office downstairs, make sure you wear them.” 

“Okay, and Da?” He raised an eyebrow when she started waving him down, but did so anyway, “good luck,” she whispered before finally running off and out the door.

“She’s cute,” Inej finally spoke, startling him into looking back at her, “what’s her name?”

“Kaia, but we call her Crow around here.”

“Kaia Brekker?”

“No, Kaia Rietveld, Brekkers are born from what is wrong in the world and there is nothing wrong with my Crow.”

“She is yours, then?”

“In everything but blood,” he paused, “but I love her as if she were.”

Inej only nodded, looking away from him for the first time since she’d arrived. Looking around the room, he started to notice a small smile creeping onto her face, finally the look of someone who had just come back home after a long trip. He always wondered what this reunion would be like, he expected he’d have a letter in advance to warn him of her arrival, that he’d meet her at the docks and be like any other couple who hadn’t seen each other in years. He should have anticipated her showing up unannounced, it was something she did all the time.

“It’s nice to see you focusing on something other than your work,” she said, “you do keep her away from it, right?” she sounded worried, not even knowing the girl for more than a few minutes and she was already worrying about her safety.

“Other than a few mishaps, she is kept away, she doesn’t even stay here with me.”

“Where does she stay then?”

“At the mansion.”

“And what do you tell people? Is she Jesper and Wylan’s daughter? Your daughter?”

“She’s my ward, less of a danger that way.”

She nodded again, this time using the silence to walk over to him, Kaz flexed his hand, itching to reach out for her, knowing that he could. Something else that had come from raising Crow was the practise it gave Kaz with touch. As a baby, Crow wasn’t fond of the feeling of leather when Kaz picked her up. He started slow, removing them and holding her through the blanket and slowly, after almost two years, he was finally able to help during her nightly bath. He only wore them out in public now, never at the mansion or in his own bedroom or office. Even now, he could see Inej’s eyes flick down to his bare hands, not shocking but something that made her smile grow a tiny bit bigger.

“You’ve changed, Kaz,” she said, “you’re-“

“Old?”

“We’re only twenty-four, not old.”

He subconsciously ran a hand through his hair, knowing that there were a few grays hiding despite his relatively young age. He knew they came from stress, but Crow had pulled one out a few days ago and she’d said her Oma Marya had hair like his. Marya wasn’t the youngest person in the world and Crow apologized for making him sad. He wasn’t sad, of course, but the comment reminded him he wasn’t seventeen anymore.

“I was going to say you’re still the same as when I left,” she paused, finally having reached him and from where she stood, just a step between them, she placed her hand up against his cheek, something he’d been able to handle since the first time she returned from a voyage.

“The same? I hear some of my new recruits talking and according to them I’m very-“

“They’re right, you are.”

Kaz smirked and he could tell Inej wanted to use the hand she was holding up to hit him, but she didn’t, instead she stepped even closer, slowly, waiting for him to step back. However, he didn’t. They’d done this only once, the night before she left, his going away and birthday present all wrapped in one. He’d given her a shiny new captain’s hat as well, but that wasn’t as important.

“Does Kaia know about me?” She asked just before he had the chance to lean down to her, he froze, raising his eyebrows at her.

“No, in the last four years, I had no intention of telling her about the other intelligent, beautiful, perfect Suli girl in my life, not like I loved her or anything.”

She laughed, and his smirk turned into a smile, earlier that day he thought about how he wanted to hear Crow laugh forever, but hearing Inej laugh now, he was reminded of how much he’d loved it even back when they were just starting this whole business.

“Loved?” She was teasing, he knew, but he couldn’t help but frown down at her.

“I love you, back then, now, nothing has changed,” he assured her, finally leaning down to kiss her.

Their kiss was something he’d been thinking about every day since it happened, and this one topped that one in everything. All awkwardness that their first one had been being gone with this one, it was more sure, deeper, a lot closer than their last one had been. That is, until they were forced apart by the door bursting open again.

“Da, Anika said she can’t-oh.” Inej turned her back to the door, hand going up to her mouth to stifle her laughter. Kaz stared at Crow, wondering what was going through her head at the sight of her Da being with a woman. She’d seen Wylan and Jesper kiss many times. There was even an incident when she’d seen a bit more than she was meant to and they’d played it off as a game, believable to a three-year-old who was half asleep and just wanting a glass of water. However, she knew Wylan and Jesper were a couple, practically married, but Inej was just a stranger to her, even if she’d heard the stories they all told her.

“Anika can’t what?” Kaz asked, trying to get her to think of something other than what she’d just seen. He was lucky Crow was easily distracted, it helped a lot with hiding things from her.

“Get me waffles, she said she has work.” She still sounded distracted, still in shock. Kaz sighed and nodded, remembering that he was the one who gave her to task of getting rid of their latest Squealer, Ilya. Kaz was supposed to do it but he had the unexpected drop off of Crow that enabled him from completing half the tasks for the day. Looking back at Inej, he frowned, as much as he’d love to spend the time with her, Crow came first, always.

He was about to speak but Inej had turned just then, smiling at Crow before kneeling to her height.

“You know, I make the best waffles, better than your Da,” Inej whispered, Crow looked between her and Kaz before laughing, her hands flying up to her mouth as they always did, “want to try them?” She nodded, not even second guessing the offer of food from a stranger. It worried Kaz a bit, what if it wasn’t Inej and really was a stranger offering it to her? However, the thought left his mind when Inej stood again, grabbing the coat she’d taken off at some point before taking Crow’s hand. The Slat’s kitchen was converted for medical needs, no one who lived in the place liked cooking anyway, it was wasted space. Any cooking they ever did was done in the kitchens of the club, it was practically unused there too so he had no reason to deny the request when some asked him.

Inej started leading Crow back out the door, Kaz watched how easily Crow took to her. Crow was naturally a trusting person, much to his distain, but she’d learned about being weary of people from him, finding out that not everyone was going to be her friend. He suspected her immediate liking to Inej was because of him, if she hadn’t seen her with him she would not have gone with her so easily.

“Coming, Da?” Crow asked over her shoulder before Inej could lead her out the door.

“Of course, I kind of want to try these waffles too, considering I’ve never seen Inej near a stove burner before.”

“Five years, Brekker, I’ve learned many things you haven’t experienced yet.” She turned her own head and winked at him, his eyes widened instantly, jaw going slack. They weren’t strangers to talk like that, but it had been so long since he heard it straight from Inej’s mouth that it shocked him. “C’mon, Kaz, your girls need dinner!” His previous thought vanished, his girls, Kaz liked the sound of that.

-

“Why did you never tell me about her?” Inej asked later that night.

Crow had fallen asleep on her shoulder on their walk back from the Crows Club, and after placing her in her old bedroom, Inej followed him back up to his own room. She was about to lock the door but Kaz stopped her, Crow wouldn’t be used to waking up there and she’d come straight up when she needed him. A locked door would just scare her even more. Inej had commented on how much he’d changed, behaviour wise, when it came to Crow. She said she liked it better than he used to be, he was nicer. He told her all about the letter that came with Crow, how he’d needed the help of Marya, how the Dregs all protected her as their own, everything from the day they found the cradle on the front step. Inej learned all about how Crow became the centre of the world for everyone, and how they’d all adapted to her being around.

“I tried, but I wanted you to see her instead of you thinking the worst,” he said, “and I was afraid of the chance you wouldn’t love her as much as we all do, as much as I do.”

“That wouldn’t have happened, have I never told you I love children? Three younger sisters, Kaz, Kaia sort of looks like my youngest.”

Inej had told him all about her family the night her parents had left, she hadn’t gone with them that day, too busy starting to plan her life as a sea Captain. They stayed up until they saw the sun the next day, Kaz just listening to Inej go on about her life before she was taken. With his knowledge, he should’ve known that Inej would love Crow, a happy reminder of the people she was missing from back home.

Laying there now, face to face on his bed, he still listened to her talk. This time it wasn’t the life she left behind, but the life she had found, the one that gave her as much joy as being up on the high wire did. She had five years worth of tales to tell him, he had the same to tell her, and that night they did the same as they did back then. The only time they stopped talking was when Kaz wanting to finish what was interrupted earlier, showing Inej that she didn’t have to settle for just touching hands and brief kisses. Inej was home, Crow was with him, and Kaz couldn’t have asked for anything more.


End file.
